highspeed internet...and brides

I trudged through the sludge, now melted and re-frozen dozens of times, to a cafe with wireless to investigate how to go about getting an extension for my taxes. The downside of these cafes is that they're stuffed with nasty American men engaged in the slave trading--oops, I mean internet bride--industry. The fellow next to me is an older Kansan in a flannel shirt with a gorgeous young woman, her best friend, and a translator in tow. He's complaining about American women and how they think they can boss men around and telling her about all the great gun shows he goes to. What a winner--no wonder he can't find a woman for free!